Premarital Counselling

Building a Strong Foundation before Marriage

Getting married is one of the most significant milestones in life, and it's essential to enter into this new chapter with a secure foundation and the skills to cultivate a lasting, healthy relationship. I focus on preparing couples for the journey ahead by equipping them with the tools and insights necessary to build a resilient and fulfilling marriage.

In our sessions, we work on skill building to process unresolved hurts, recurring issues, and effective conflict management. Additionally, my goal is to prepare you to navigate future conflicts by reducing the behaviors John Gottman famously termed the "Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse": criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. These behaviors are strong predictors of relationship demise, but with the right guidance, they can be mitigated or avoided.

Premarital Counselling goes beyond managing conflicts—it’s about strengthening a deep emotional connection and building an enduring and resilient bond. I will help you develop a stronger understanding of each other’s inner worlds, enhance romance, and improve your intimate connection. Together, I will help you work on setting goals, creating meaningful rituals, and establishing a sense of shared purpose that will support your marriage for years to come.

This early investment in your relationship is key to building a long and healthy partnership. By addressing these areas before marriage, you and your partner will be better prepared to face future challenges with empathy, trust, and respect - laying the groundwork for a lifetime of love and commitment.

To read more about the Four Horsemen, click here.

What to Expect

Session 1 - Assessment and History: Our initial session is an orientation to the couples therapy process. We delve into the reasons for seeking therapy and explore your relationship's history, tracing it back to its beginnings. Following the first session, I will send both you and your partner a questionnaire via email to be completed independently. These questionnaires are part of the assessment process for an additional $50 CAD cost.

Session 2 - Individual Sessions: In our second session, I will meet with each partner individually for 45 minutes. This allows me to gain deeper insights into your unique histories and perspectives.

Session 3 - Feedback Session: During the third session, we reconvene as a group. I will provide feedback based on assessments completed thus far, highlighting strengths and target areas to work on. I will also propose a plan for therapy and we will collaborate to ensure that my proposed plan fits for you and your partner.

Feedback - You will receive a personalized 10 page relationship feedback summary from the assessment process.

Pre-Marital Counselling: Strengthening Your Connection

This process may include handouts and strategies for:

Dialogue about differences and effective compromise.
Processing past arguments.
Managing emotional overwhelm during conflicts.
Calming your nervous system for difficult conversations.
Keeping your relationship exciting and romantic.
Exploring shared goals and dreams while honouring individuality.

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Rates:

Couples therapy sessions last 80 minutes and are $250 per session.

The Gottman Method: An Evidence-Based Approach

Drs. John and Julie Gottman, the founders of the Gottman Institute and creators of Gottman Method Couples Therapy, have developed their approach based on over 40 years of research. This method focuses on what makes relationships work and how to heal relationship wounds. Its goal is to help couples build strong relationships by learning how to have better conversations, understand each other more deeply, respond to emotional bids, manage conflict, and honour each other's life dreams. Click here for more about the Gottman Method.